In addition to being Breast Cancer Awareness Month, it’s also Attachment Parenting month. The theme of this year’s Attachment Parenting month is “Giving our Children Presence.” API Speaks, the blog of Attachment Parenting International, is holding a blog carnival of presence to bring awareness to how we can give our children our presence in the upcoming season of presents (the carnival ends Oct 15, so there’s still time if you want to participate — p.s. there are prizes).
With the economic crisis, U.S. election and banking bailout dominating the news, I have been hearing so much from Republicans about how the bailout is, horror of all horrors, a first step towards socialism! The next thing you know, the US will be, dum dum da dummmm, Europe! As someone who was one of those Republicans before moving to Germany over 6 years ago, a country with social welfare, public healthcare, and generous parental leave, I have to tell you that I am now a believer. The system here works.
Germany pays me to be a stay at home mom.
Germany makes it easy for me to be a stay at home mom. For the first year of a child’s life, the government gives the stay at home parent Elterngeld (parental allowance) of 60% of their pre-child salary, up to 1800 Euro a month, with a minimum monthly allowance of about 300 Euro a month. In addition to this, the parents receive a monthly Kindergeld (child allowance) of 154 Euro for each child, up until at least their 18th birthday, plus there’s a tax credit. This money allows me to stay home without worrying about making ends meet, giving my son an extra 35–40 hours a week of my presence that I’m not sure I could give him if I was living in a country that didn’t provide these kinds of benefits.
Then after this first year of paid leave, the stay at home parent’s job is protected for up to two more years of unpaid leave. That means a mom (or dad) can stay home with their child for three years and still go back to their job. This along with public healthcare and other benefits of the social welfare system here in Germany, allow me to relax and be more present for my son. Everything is taken care of, our healthcare, even his college tuition. In Germany, we will only need to pay college fees. Sure we pay a lot of taxes for these benefits, but even if my husband were to lose his job, we would still have these benefits, we wouldn’t be forced to live in a car, our son could still attend university. You wouldn’t believe the kind of peace of mind this gives me, freeing me up to read, build towers, and play choo choo all day long with my little one.
How do other industrialized countries handle parental allowance?
- Denmark provides parental allowance for 12 months, the allowance is 100% of the pre-child income for the first six months and 90% of the pre-child income for the second six months.
- Norway provides a parental allowance of 80% of the pre-child income for twelve months, or 100% of the pre-child income for ten months.
- In Sweden, the parental allowance is 80% of the pre-child income for thirteen months.
- In Finland, the allowance is 70% of the pre-child income for nine months.
- Estonia provides 100% of the pre-child income for one year.
- There is no parental allowance based on previous income in France or Great Britain, but rather a lump sum amount paid based on the number of children.
- You can find a comprehensive list covering most other countries at Wikipedia’s page on Parental Leave.
How do you give presence to your children? Has the country you live in made a difference?
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Christina, very well written. And excellent points. As a preemie mom, I give lots of credit to the healthcare system here. During Henry’s first year alone, between his initial hospital bill, numerous doctor’s visits (and co-pays, not to mention higher co-pays for the specialists), prescriptions, you name it, we spent close to $5k. And we had excellent health insurance through my hubby’s work.
Since moving to Germany, we still end up seeing the doctor at least once monthly for illnesses, have been on constant breathing treatments, and even made a recent trip to the ER. What did it cost me? Nothing financially. What did it give me? Piece of mind, that I, like you, can give my best to my child.
And then, I’m pregnant again – in a high-risk pregnancy. What do all my extra testings/specialists/etc. cost me additional? Nothing. What does that give my unborn child – everything!
Very well written yourself, Alice! I’ve got a bad back and my health insurance even sent me to rehab for 3 weeks, for free. The health care system is wonderful here. All the horror stories the anti-public insurance crowd in the US spout about long waits and poor care are just wrong. We get treated immediately and the treatment is top notch.
I hate to sound like an echo, but this is indeed very well written. I just had to reference this post on my blog – I hope you don’t mind!
Some friends of mine in MN just had a baby. Mom doesn’t work and Dad could only take a few days off as his company doesn’t give paternity leave. I read your article and feel so sad and mad about the healthcare in the US. I hope our next president is allowed to make some serious reforms.
@Mariecel: Don’t mind at all!
@Jennifer: Oh yeah, the dads can take off here too. When Oliver was born, Rainer ONLY took off two weeks because he had to teach, but for 2 more weeks he only went in for half-days. I know a dad who took off 2 months, while the mom is taking off a year, and another dad who took off 4 weeks.
I had no complaints about the quality of medical care I received in Germany. (Bedside manner is a different story but no health care system can change that!)
My husband took 2 weeks when our son was born, a month of leave when he was 4 months old, and another month when he was 7 months old. It was fantastic. It’s hard to imagine not having that kind of time together if we decide to have another child in the US.
As an American also living in Germany I can only confirm what has been written here. We do have to pay higher taxes but have the peace of mind that a safety net is always there to catch our fall. On the other hand, there is a definate lack of good quality day care for under 3′s for the mom’s who want to got back to work. It is expected here that all moms take the 3 years off regardless of their careers. Still, having said that, it is GREAT to have the choice! I have been able to find a balance by working 10 hours a week and slowly increasing my hours until my girls enter kindergarten at 3. In the US, it is usually all or nothing as soon as 8 weeks after giving birth. As stated above, the system works!
That’s true, Monica. In our village, there is only one daycare facility and they only offer 11 hours a week over two days. In Regensburg, the next largest city, it is possible but difficult. I know a mom who works 35 hours a week, and had a hard time finding a spot for her child in daycare. Besides that, the only other options are getting a Tagesmutter, who takes care of up to six kids out of her home, or getting an au pair. But like you said, it’s nice to at least have a choice. I can’t imagine having to go back to work when my little guy was 8 weeks old.
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